Wednesday, August 25, 2010

A Lifetime in a Day

I've been feeling lately that I live a whole life emotionally in one day. The good, the bad, the ugly. And the powerful. I get ready to share a thought and then get too tired to actually write it down.

Have you seen Inception? Of course I'm a Chris Nolan fan (Jared and I saw The Dark Knight twice in one day). I love the way his mind works. I love the places he goes and the questions he asks. He understands madness. But more beautiful is that he understands hope.

I cried and cried and then had to go to the ladies room and cry some more. The entire movie was a perfect metaphor to my life. I felt the beauty of knowing this life is nothing but a dream. Our true reality is our spirits. This time here is nothing but a dream. A dream we have some control over, but a dream nonetheless.

On another level, my third layer is the dream of depression. It seems SO real. Your emotions and thoughts are so powerful, but your intellect tells you they aren't. Which one to choose? Which one is reality? The constant conflict is exhausting and draining. Letting go to rise to truth is both painful and exhilarating.

Anyhow, I have so much more to say, but I'm tired today.

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